Potpourri

We're two weeks away from the mid-term elections and there's a 'whole lotta shakin' goin' on.' I don't think I can add anything to the national conversation that hasn't already been said: witches, illegal housekeepers, inexperienced dolts and the usual punch/counter-punch of misrepresentations on both sides. As for the Tea Party and their presumed influence on the outcome, I will not dignify their ilk with comment.

So here's a random list, apropos of some things and nothing, of what's been on my mind lately. Many of these are generalizations but most bear some kernel of truth:

Mothers get blamed for everything and fathers, by and large, get free passes. Fathers can get away with murder but mothers are expected to be saints.

People who cut in line should be called out in polite but bellowing tones, reminding the offenders that other customers are following the rules, they broke them and it's not OK. Passive onlookers who say nothing are the reason such inconsiderate piggies continue to do it.

While grammar has generally gone the way of land-line phones, the media and the citizenry are committing grotesque crimes against the English language. The most glaring example I hear each day is the misuse of "is" versus "are", as in "There's too many instances of robbery."

Someone should inform TV newscasters that "the very latest" is redundant.

I welcome being wired for sound when I'm doing a power walk, and see the convenience of CDs, MP3s and iPods. But analog and vinyl still rule and there's no substitute, acoustically speaking, for listening to an entire album on a turntable. (Assuming you own a really good stereo system.)

It appears that, like JFK's assassination, we'll never know the real truth behind 9/11.

The placement of bathroom tissue on the dispenser is a hotly contested issue. For the record, sane people install it rolling out over, not under.

How is it that Nicholas Sparks' books are bestsellers and are subsequently made into movies? This applies to scores of so-called writers, of course. I picked up "The Notebook" in a grocery stack one day, read the first few lines and almost hurled. (As in the book, into the air, and slang for vomited.)

Someone should put an end to low-cut gowns (cut to the navel, that is) with openings wide enough to view half of female breasts. Jennifer Lopez started this trend and now it's ubiquitous. No woman with an ample bosom can manage it; it's strictly for the flatter-chested. And how do they keep their boobs from popping out? Velcro? Elmer's glue?

Moviegoers who talk during the feature presentation or make loud noises snarfing their popcorn should be ejected from their seats, James Bond-style. (For those of you who remember the real Bond, pre-Roger Moore.)

People who open their presents on Christmas Eve are cheating.

The Beatles are the greatest rock and roll band, period.

Global warming is not an environmentalist, Al Gore-concocted hoax. Check the latest stats for warmest years on record.

Logic serves an essential purpose and eludes far too many of us. However, the dictates of your heart and intuition are worth listening to, and, to achieve happiness, followed.

Finally, bloggers often have nothing better to do than post their worthless opinions. You need no credentials to blog. All you need is a computer and an attitude. Frankly, most of us need to get a life.

Don't forget to vote!